Author: kate

Affirmative Thinking and Nonduality

Q. Can affirmations change my life?

A. When we wake from the world of form, for some time the process can be very messy. The ego structure is now stronger than ever because it is unraveling the word of form – the good, the bad, and the ugly. Everything during a period of post-awakening (which can last for years) is extremely vivid and extremely intense for this reason. Highs and lows are extreme.

Affirmations are statements based on what it is that the mind wants. If one does not know what they want, they may simply look at what they don’t want and create the opposite affirmative thought.

When a thought is thought enough times, it becomes a belief. A belief becomes a focus and also a blind spot, because it is a stronger form of thought, so it commands more attention. That which we focus on the most becomes the primary experience of what is believed to be the reality.

“And Jesus said unto the centurion, Go thy way; as thou hast believed, so be it done unto thee. And the servant was healed in that hour.”

Affirmations and beliefs belong to the world of “I”, or the ”me” energy. This energy believes it has an identity, it believes that it takes independent action and is on a mission which it must complete during its life, which is believed to be in the realm of time lasting a duration counted in decades.

Yes, affirmations can change what it is that is appearing in the realm of temporal experience.

If you are watching a horror movie, you can re-write this into a romance movie. If you are watching a movie of defeat, you can change this into a movie of victory. You can do this effortlessly and instantly if you focus on the desired result and believe that it shall come to be.

When the “me” energy is lost in a problem it will immediately go into the realm of thought to try and fix the problem. Thought can never fix the problem of the “me” energy because the “me” energy is the problem. The “me” energy oscillates between what it wants and what it doesn’t want. Its job is to organize a plan to get what it thinks it wants, and to avoid what it thinks it doesn’t want. It is continually working, exhausting itself and considering itself a “good me” if it succeeds and a “bad me” if it doesn’t. It can think itself into a good me and it can think it’s movie into a good movie! Or it can think itself into a “bad me” and a “bad movie”. In fact, that’s a healthy and positive expression of the me. It can give the “me” happiness and pleasure to be healthy, loved, free and rich in its own movie.

However, what one thinks one wants is not ever what one truly wants. The “me” energy only ever wants the Truth of it’s very being, which is love. This is why it can never find a real solution to getting itself back home to peace and love. It could only do this through complete and total surrender to life itself.

Who is this “me” thing and where does it come from?

Well, let’s simply look at the movie analogy. When we go to a theatre to watch a film, the film is being played by a projector onto the screen.

Without the light and the projector (God or Love) the dream (plot) cannot appear on the screen (consciousness). The dream is the mind and the world – which are one thing. That which appears in the mind also appears in the world of form.

In Christianity, this is also the Holy Trinity. The Father (Love), son (plot-mind), and the Holy Ghost (consciousness).

“Brahman is real. The universe is unreal. Brahman is the universe.” ~ Ramana Maharshi

Affirmations appear in the world of that which is unreal.

Do you see the problem here?

Yes… you can’t win! Just look – can you name any form that arises, that also doesn’t dissipate in the world of form or mind? Thoughts come and go, feelings come and go, beliefs come and go, bodies come and go, money comes and goes…

The world of form, is, therefore, that which is unreal.

Raman Maharshi says that if something is real, it must be real forever, and not just for some time.

In sum, “Dream water, quenches dream thirst.” ~ Ramana Maharshi

Remember that which is eternal which is this empty looking, this aliveness this sense of presence that is sitting at the computer reading these words right now. Surrender to that. I encourage you to watch a beautiful movie of your life but if you look for freedom or fulfillment in this movie, you will lose that which you think you’ve gained when the movie ends. The truth is eternal. It has no beginning or end and can never be lost.


I am bad!

One of the most fundamental beliefs that a human acquires about themselves is that there’s something “wrong” with them. This can become a self-concept of being a “bad”  or “lazy” or some kind of person.

We see this through the disciplinary measures utilized by our parental figures, in the schoolhouses, and also in religion. The human acts out an urge is judged for it, punished, and then feels guilt and shame.

A false self-concept is so deeply embedded within our unconscious and subconscious mind, that we often only access subsidiary effects of it, such as an external and conscious emotional disturbance with can look like an argument with a partner or an addiction to social media or overeating.

Let’s look at the media because it plays such a fundamental role in creating desires and wants within the human.

If one can simply look at whom they idealize or even demonize, we can see that the people, images, sites or social media accounts that are typically followed indicate a pattern of interests, wants and desires that we deeply hold in the conscious and subconscious mind, and of course, the collective unconscious mind as well.

For example, a woman may see other women her age who are beautiful or attractive and she may desire that attractiveness for herself. A man might be attracted to images and messaging of success, and look up to figures who make millions of dollars and own businesses, as these are things himself that he is keen on achieving. A woman in her mid-thirties may see other pregnant women because she herself struggles with infertility or her “clock”.

Interestingly, the behavior stems from a desire or want, yet validates the predominant unconscious belief.

For example, “I am not as beautiful as the celebrities, I’ve done something wrong. I’m bad.” or “I haven’t achieved enlightenment yet, what’s wrong with me?” and of course we have the “I should..” beliefs that stem from the demands of others and the collective and have become adopted by our own psyches, as ours.

According to Freud’s psychotherapy models illustrated in his iceberg image, the belief “I’m bad” causes emotional distress and mental activity of agitation or the addiction itself. This is visible to the conscious mind. The subconscious then houses the memories of all the times that we were bad, as children and as adults. It holds the memories of being punished, ashamed, getting bad grades, being left by the partner, and so forth. Now, in the unconscious is where things get very interesting. This is the part of the self that houses fear and also instinct. This is where one may house the actual self-concept itself.

Freud then took this iceberg model and deconstructed it into the id, ego, and the superego. The id, ego, and superego have most commonly been conceptualized as three essential parts of the human personality. He used these categories to conceptualize mental functions, all of which exist underneath the conscious realms. According to this model, the id is responsible for our instincts, the ego is responsible for our reality and the superego is responsible for morality.

The id hops on to the social media to satisfy and gratify it’s pleasure instincts. It does not feel rich or beautiful, but simply by looking at images of people who are, it can satisfy this desire. The ego’s goal is to satisfy the demands of the id. It is now on the lookout for ways in which it can acquire wealth and beauty, within a socially acceptable manner. The superego can now make sure that the inner standards of morality are followed. And if one does not follow them, the superego will activate guilt and shame.

The basic existential dilemma is that each element demands something that is incompatible with the other two and inner conflict is inevitable.

The inner conflict is then acted out by the ego in one of multiple forms: repression, denial, projection, displacement, repression and sublimation.

Psychoanalysis as well as dream interpretation works to resolve and also offer a “royal road to the unconscious”.

This is also one of the very many effects of awareness.

In dreamwork, an underlying desire is translated into manifest content. The forbidden wishes become translated into a nonthreatening or sometimes even threatening form.

As we hold a magnifying lens up to that which is visible and perceived with the conscious mind, we gain extraordinary insight into the composition of the psyche. Simply sitting on the couch watching TV may make us “lazy” or acting out an extreme emotional response may make us “crazy” and so forth. We are now enacting the bad person who is not perfect and does not live up to it’s ideal, and this personna becomes an energy embedded within the way we speak, act, perceive and express – significantly limiting the full expression of consciousness.

Consciousness is now not emanating a free and unlimited expression. Rather it is expressing through the filter of the unconscious.

A wonderful archetype that gives us supreme insight into the condition is the biblical Mary Magdalene.

She is the stereotypical “bad self”, representing a self-image that is tainted. A person who is not perfect. She comes to Jesus, she begins to wipe Jesus’ feet and cry. The Pharisee who is present says, “If this man were a prophet, he would have known who and what sort of woman this is who is touching him, for she is a sinner.” This is the world’s judgment of Mary. Her behavior is not desirable and she herself is condemned. Nonetheless, Jesus instantly and simply says, “Your sins are forgiven. Your faith has saved you, go in peace.”

This mythological story says so much. Firstly it shows that an open heart is always a pure heart, regardless of the past. In fact, it is Mary’s act of looking for grace that saves her!

As we shift out of our negative self-concepts and look into the light, we see clearly that we are forgiven, or even lifted out of any self-concepts instantly, and free to emanate what we truly are, the pure, pristine light of the God-self.


What You Love, Is What You Are.

Everything we experience is attracted into our experience.

How are we attracting this?

Not by our thoughts. Our thoughts are secondary to our beliefs about ourselves. We allow ourselves to do what we believe. What we do attracts what we experience, NOT what we think.

Our beliefs about ourselves, therefore hold the key to understanding what it is that we are experiencing.

It is not possible for something to come into your life if it doesn’t hold the predominant vibration of your psycho-electromagnetic field or your energy as a whole.

While our energies are complex fields that are made up of everything we’ve come into contact with and everything that we are, everything we’ve come into contact with has always been vibrating at the frequency of our “self”, what we believe we are.

What’s most interesting here, is that while we can hold and create a different vibration by focusing on our desires and wants, we will ultimately then will only attract what we want, but not what we are. What we attract is then held in the cage of what we “think” we want.

This may be controversial when looked at through the spiritual understanding of “what you are is love.” You may think “Well if what I am is love, why am I not attracting what I love, because what I love is what I want.”

The truth is that what you love, is what you are.

Do you do what you love?

Or are you in conflict with what you love?

When you do what you love, you can then attract what you want. Simply taking in information and utilizing affirmations, will actually keep you away from what it is you want, which is what you are.

In order to be in full alignment with the love that you are, one must learn to go head-first, fully into that which they love.

When one is living their life through their love, it is then when they are attracting their rightful belongings, what they TRULY are, and not what they are as a result of environmental conditions, physical limitations or thinking patterns, and also not what they “think” they want.

The truth is that we must go beyond all those limitations, to experience the fullness of the freedom that non-duality is referring to.

Yes, we are love and we are free. That is the Truth. But how does this love and freedom express when it is not confined by anything?

Simply put: it follows what it loves, or what it is attracted to, without any blockages or perceived obstacles. It shifts with the ebb and flow of what it is attracted to at any given moment.

If you don’t know what that is for yourself, it’s because of one of two reasons.

Firstly, you’ve likely spent years following that which was untrue, so you’ve lost touch with your essence. Implement a practice called listening or meditation. This “receiving” energy is internal and not external like “getting” or going after something. A recieving energy can be compared to a letting go, a pause, stillness or surrender. Let what needs to come up in this space come up so that it can clear out. This can be confusing and messy, but ultimately it is an intelligent process of consciousness that I refer to as “emotional composting.” It gives rise to new life, new desires, and new shifts that are much more authentic and in alignment with the Truth of the person.

Another reason, one may not know what it is that they love or are attracted to is because they give up in the “emotional composting” phase and get stuck. This is when the discomfort of emptiness prevents the person from patiently integrating the mass shift in consciousness. This is when the person is confronted with negativity, separation, fear of death and ultimately facing questions like, “Can I truly let go and allow myself to perish?”.

What you are, is what you love.

This means that, yes, you are getting to know yourself all over again. You may have spent 10, 30, or 60 years in an identity and you think you’ve got it all figured out – your likes and dislikes. Awakening puts this to the test throwing you full force into a real confrontation with your thoughts, behaviors, beliefs, and actions. This process is actually extremely subtle and NOT self-evident and one will go years without having any clue of what is actually going on, until one day they wake up and they realize that something they once loved or did, is no longer an attractive force. Moreover, key habits, beliefs, and behaviors become less and less important as to why they’re happening and one is not wondering how one must fix them, and whether they’re the reason one is not getting what they want. One may initially think they’re sabotaging themselves, made a mistake, or are failing in the awakening process. These are all workings of the mind. In reality, the Self had never made an error and everything was perfectly on target – transforming perfectly all along!

Waking up, enlightenment, the dropping of the personal self, ultimately, goes unnoticed. The shifts are so subtle and so quiet that one really has no footing here and no clue of what’s going on and why it’s happening, or whether anything is really happening in the first place. Enlightenment is a quiet process happening on an energetic level. This is why it can’t be seen or understood or figured out. Furthermore, it’s not that one is gaining anything like liberation. Quite the opposite. One is actually losing everything. One is losing attachments, knowledge, beliefs, concepts, and ideas – until absolutely nothing is left. And that’s the truth: enlightenment is a loss process, not a getting process. Then what one is, which is love is all that is left. What you are, is what you love.

And this is the unknown that one must make peace with. We must acknowledge that we don’t know anything besides this moment. And that even this moment is a total mystery.

This is the freedom and also the love.

Is There Really a Dead End?

Our sense of joy is derived from the relationship to our desire.

The instant a want or desire appears, does it come from a place of need?

Desires that stem from a sense of agitation or incompletion are called “seeking” and also “suffering”.

In non-duality, the relationship is simply being. There either is or there isn’t a desire, and it either is or it isn’t fulfilled.

There is no sense of deriving happiness from acquiring or fulfilling desires.

From identification, there is the question upon hearing this: “Well, how do I get there? I’m still seeking; what do I do about that?”

The answer is so darn simple.

The truth or nature can be explored by anyone the instant that question arises. Whether one has a spiritual foundation or even the desire for truth, that inquiry remains just as valid. We are ultimately asking:

What is the truth? Where is my home? Where is my place of rest?

Just the curiosity of the question itself gives rise to the nature of life and the nature of the universe.

What one must do is ask that question and simply observe, inquire into the nature of presence by being present, by being presence.

And this isn’t a recommendation, an answer or a path.

To look is as effortless as watching a bird on a tree branch. It is already happening, and now it can happen with your energy because you are consciously doing this.

Just like when a gaze lands on the bluebird and now suddenly you’re intrigued – “what a beautiful bluebird” your energy says.

Keep looking relentlessly. Stay present completely.

Watch. Watch. Watch. Wait. Wait. Wait.
One’s attention must be willing to look until each and every form completely dissolves, one by one until nothing is left except simple looking.

What is this simple looking?

Interest in the world of form subsides, once it is fully, clearly and completely seen and recognized that no getting, no desire, no form can fulfill the sense of lack that one feels.

This is completely radical and new to the egoic structure of the self, which is structured upon lack and acquisition. Once it is recognized that nothing in the world of form can satisfy this self – it is then that that self can begin dissolution and deconstruction.

Like an ice cube in the sun, the self dissolves simply into what’s happening (also known as the present, but this present is outside of the confines of past, present, and future – the confines of time).

In this “isness” in “THIS” the one, seamless, vivid, aliveness – reality itself – begins to pervade every inch and every corner of one’s very being.

Once reality is touched, even just slightly, this is powerful enough to set one’s soul completely aflame and begin the natural process of awakening of consciousness to itself.

Consciousness is seen as deeply and consistently ever-changing, ever—new, refreshing and revitalizing LOVE.

In this sense, awakening is happening all the time, infinitely and it is never the same. It is always alive, always new. Nature is fully and totally electric, vivid and nothing goes stale or dies in it.

It is this essence of divine love which brings back life to even the most lifeless places, makes a way through a dead-end, ends the spiritual search and eventually consumes the entire life of the human, consciously.

Worldly Pleasures

If we stopped taking action for the purpose of worldly gain, would not the moment, just as it is, be enough?

We may not even realize that the underlying current of our dis-ease, suffering, anxiety, and fear is that we will not get or we will lose, some aspect of the dream.

What is meant by the dream?

Quite simply, the dream is the idea that you are someone, a body, that is separate from all of life, making independent decisions and taking independent actions that will dictate whether or not security, love, and freedom will be had.

Just as we wake from the dreams we have at night while we are asleep, instantly, we must too wake from this worldly dream.

The Buddha, Jesus and so many other great teachers taught that the kingdom of God is within. This is such a simple teaching, that it is most often overlooked and simply glazed over.

For someone who is greatly identified with body, the idea of simply cutting off from the dream of seeking is almost an impossibility in their mind. The fear of life and the belief in death continue to be the motivating driving factors of how one lives.

This sounds abrupt, but the way in which this plays out is so subtle. The clerk hits you with a large bill, your lover says something nasty to you, your child misbehaves, your co-worker takes credit for something you did. More intricately though, is the massive surge of energy that is pushing against the flow of life and attempting to run from the present moment. This is the root of suffering.

That THIS, what’s appearing, this right here IS NOT ENOUGH. That there is a better place than this. In the mind’s view THIS is evil. THIS is where hell is: not enough money, not enough love, not enough creativity…never enough.

When a small or even large pleasure is had, this discontent is covered up and there is activity. For a temporary and brief moment, it is forgotten that something is unnerved and seeking. The beast has been fed… until, of course, once again it is hungry and begins its games.

The way out of the dream is the walking away from worldly gains. But in order for one to do this, it must be seen that what can be had, can also be lost. And if something can be had or lost then it is not that which is truly being sought. At another level, it can also be seen that that which was doing the seeking is the same thing as that which is being sought, immediately bringing the game to an end.

What was being sought, was actually never being sought. It was the seeking that was causing the conflict, not the actual idea of loss and gain. The mechanism that is looking for a better place than THIS is the whole dream, it is the source and the expression of conflict.

Moreover, it was never, ever you that was doing the seeking. You are not a fuck up because THIS is not enough for you. You are not to blame for this, you didn’t make this error of judgment. You were never actually here. You were part of the dream of seeking. In fact, you were simply being experienced. The whole idea of “you” and the “thing” you were seeking were all one thing, seemingly appearing as two. The truth is the same thing that was seeking is the same thing that was being sought. You were always home. You were always here. You were always THIS. Nothing needed to change for you to wake up. In fact, waking up was always instantaneous and it was always happening right here right now. Waking up is continually happening, it actually never stops happening. Waking up is all there is, was and ever will be. You can never actually “get” here, because you were always here!

If you are caught in the dream of worldly pleasures and worldly gain, that is why you are unhappy and that is why you are suffering.

Just stop.

Wake up.

Just like you wake up from a nightmare or any dream – just awaken.

Were you the one who woke yourself up from the dream?

Who woke you up from the dream?

How did you wake up from the dream?

It just happened.

And so, waking up from this dream too will just happen, instantly. In a swift movement.

There may be that in-between state of waking, where the dream is slowly slipping back away – but waking up is the only way forward. Fully waking.

And the dream will burn, becoming a distant memory that barely even happened.


Losing A Sense of Doership

When the personal self begins to fall through the cracks, and the light of Being starts to break through, the process can result in a sort of emotional and mental “composting”. The process for many, not all, is disorienting and results in a tremendous amount of fear. At some point, it is realized on a deep, deep level that the fear is completely impersonal. In fact, it is seen that this is not my “fear” it is fear itself that is being experienced.

The loss of a sense of personal self challenges the personal will and the idea of “do-ership”. When the light of awareness breaks through, even just for a split moment, that is enough for the whole world of the personal self to begin to crumble.

The “crumbling” is a life long process, but again, it is impersonal at this level and it is just a happening, just another appearance, like the sun or the clouds.  During this process, one of the greatest blocks to liberation post an awakening is the return to the mind.

The mind is a very safe place to be ( in fact, it’s the most dangerous place of all, but this must be seen through); it is safe because it is familiar.

The mind is the seeker himself. It is the energy that is covering up Being. This is why the process of falling away, or rather the process of dissolving the ego, is so uncomfortable. But it is an absolutely natural phenomenon. “You” are not special because of your realizations or awakenings at all! YOu never ever had an awakening or a realization. In fact, what you are is everything and everything is continually waking up to itself more deeply all the time. It’s just that consciousness or the mind, shifts in and out of expression in you and in everything.

The mind or consciousness is the single blockage to full liberation. It is often imagined that one must spend more time taming the separate self, adjusting behaviors, entering consistent sadhanas, clearing the chakras, undoing karma and samskaras, finding the ultimate teacher, reading another spiritual book, aligning with one’s destiny, making more money, finding another lover, leaving one’s town, changing one’s location – no. It’s not true. You are liberated right now. Nothing needs to change for you to have freedom, you are already fully free. It takes only a split second to see this in the story of time, and this seeing can only happen now not in some distant future. Moreover, liberation and freedom will never, ever, ever be gotten to. If that’s what you’re waiting for, your search will result in more frustration and confusion. Drop all seeking. The very genuine and honest desire to know the Truth in your being is all that is needed in order for enlightenment to take over and live through the body.

Moreover, love, relationships, money, career, and health – identification with these is the result of thought being bundled up into enough focus on one or the other that the story continually covers up the stillness of your being that is emerging. It must be understood that while losing focus and energy in them is initially uncomfortable, the process is a natural byproduct of awakening. This is because the body in involuntarily conditioned into attachment, survival, and possession. The grasp is loosened bit by bit in the appearance of time, and this period of loss is not happening to you or to anyone, it is simply the natural evolution of consciousness.

It is recommended that surrender, non-resistance or acceptance of one’s apparent awakening “process” is undergone because the resistance is just another way that the “mind” attempts to remain in control.

You were never in control. You don’t exist. You’re just a thought appearing in the illusion of time.

In reality, the unshakable ground of being will absorb thought, actions and all else that appears as separate and personal, thus it is recommended that the process is trusted on some level (which it always is) and also allowed.

Happy Waking Up!

I assure you there is no better place you’d want to be but the Truth of your very being. This process in and of itself leads to a worthwhile and fulfilling life if it is seen through all the way.

How To Deal With Difficult Emotions

How To Deal With Difficult Emotions?

When we become overcome with overwhelming feelings, it’s important to recognize that these feelings are not who we are.

If they were who you are, then you would always be angry, or grief-stricken or depressed.

But you’re not, are you? For example, when you’re sleeping, or even doing something you like then the difficult emotion most likely quiets down and then eventually goes away.

If our emotions were who we are, then they would not come and go.

This recognition doesn’t necessarily make a challenging emotion any easier.

However, what it does do, is it allows us to explore its root and learn more about an aspect of ourselves.

A technique for Exposing a Challenging Emotion

For example, let’s say the emotion we’re struggling with is “Grief.”

We may ask, “What is the sensation of this grief?” and we might say, “This grief is dense, sticky. It likes to hide and be safe.”

Are there any thoughts associated with the emotion?

The thoughts associated with this grief are: I am stuck, I am powerless, I am unworthy, I am unloved.

What terrible sad thoughts, bundled up into this one word: grief. Powerful thoughts.

What is it that is here amidst this painful thought or idea of grief that is causing suffering?

First comes an external “trigger”, the universe says something through someone, or one compares themselves or their circumstances to something that is worthy and loved, or something mirrors to this idea of -ultimately- separation aka suffering.

Now, this investigation indicates clearly that these thoughts within grief – they’re not letting love in! Therefore, they absolutely deserve your attention.

The question then becomes, why then do these thoughts arise and stay with me? Why do they feel at home? Why am I creating these thoughts of grief?

One might say, “I am creating thoughts of grief because there is a part of me that feels unworthy and unloved.”

Who is it that feels unworthy and unloved and stuck? The thought itself? What is behind the thought, if the thought is just a dead energy?

We realize almost instantly that the thought itself is powerless. In fact, the thought comes from the energy of belief.

Is it possible that the belief causing this painful suffering is no longer useful and necessary?

Is it possible that it once served the purpose of protecting us and shielding us, but now we no longer need its dead energy?

We can only work with a belief once it has come out into the open. The belief itself wants to be surrendered, otherwise, it wouldn’t be arising. No longer can the energy run away from this part of itself once it reaches the bright light of awareness. It’s virtually impossible.

Beliefs that want to be brought into the open must be surrendered, let go of and released. Some part of it must also know that it can’t really run or hide from itself any more like it used to.

It must also be realized that the belief that is causing the grief, for example, “I am not loved”, manifests into ‘sub-beliefs’ like blame, shame, guilt or some other thought that projects it’s suffering onto the external world – person, place, thing or circumstance. And it’s blaming game is endless:

  • I’m “unhappy” because I’m broke.
  • I’m sad because so-so is sick.
  • I’m upset because of my family or partner.
  • I’m mad because my boss does this or that.
  • I’m unhappy because of work, or no work, or my health or anything…and on and on.

The entire world at this moment becomes the problem.

Interestingly, the mind totally cannot get itself out of its problem. It can’t find a solution.

Therefore, it most likely will just move, change jobs, find a new relationship or move on to something else which it can hide inside of for a while.

This is an endless problem. It never finds the answer doing this. That’s why it’s said that the energy that created the problem can’t also be the one solving it. That’s also why we often get brilliant ideas hiking, showering or being with people we love.

What Can One Do When the Mind Hijacks a Painful Emotion?

One must first come back to presence. Just returning each time to the truth, the truth is that of the observer. The observer is what is here having the whole experience. Watching the whole cycle. Even though the energy is trying to fix itself and iron itself out, that will actually never happen, because the nature of the mind is unhappiness.

The mind only knows how to operate between pain and pleasure. Pleasure and pain are two sides of one coin. Therefore, one cannot find true and lasting peace in changing one’s circumstances, whatever they may be, because the nature of all things is change, movement, transformation.

Before anything changes, it first has to accept the truth.

The truth is unknown. It is the live quality of life that is only ever right here and now. This is the only place of true rest. It is the only place where everything else can stop.

Once one clearly sees how miserable the mind is making them, it becomes much easier to stop listening to it. The less and less interest the thoughts receive, the more and more one can begin to let go until everything is fully surrendered, except that which is here, was always here and will never leave, never go. What could this be? It must be investigated by each person individually.

The mind is looking for a solution to a problem that doesn’t exist. When one looks at the present moment, is there truly a real problem right now? Or is there just a painful thought or emotion or experience, that is temporal and inevitably on its way out?

You can’t leave this moment. You have to be here. This moment is all there ever was, is and will be.

This is it. You can’t really leave this moment. It’s it.

You trying to run away, means you’re running from yourself. You’re running from the love that you are and as long as you’re running from yourself you will feel separate. So stop. Just stop running. Just land.

Wherever it is that you are – jobless, angry, broke, broken, sad – just be here with yourself. Be here by realizing that you already are here. Until you realize that you have to be here at all costs, no matter if you like it or not, then you can’t truly be free.

When you stop fighting life, stop being at war with your presence, then you’ll realize your inherent freedom.

This is an energy shift.

Energy begins to shift with this awareness. And as energy shifts, life shifts.

3 Easy Steps To Dealing With Difficult Emotions

  1. The first step is to be willing to be here. No matter what ‘HERE’ looks like.
  2. Next, be willing to stop believing your thoughts. Stop trying to find your way out of fearful, uninteresting or painful thinking. Positive thoughts are just the opposite side of that. What can be gained (positive thoughts) can also be lost (negative thoughts).
  3. Lastly, be willing to wait for the truth. Like a faithful golden retriever that never lost hope that his owner would one day arrive back at the same spot where he left him. This kind of devotion, not only is the fruit of arduous labor but it also results in the slow onset of the perfume of one’s essence: Meaning, true devotion is always accompanied by love. True Love!

Of course, there will still be the natural wanting to improve one’s situation. Therefore, there is the appearance of a practical human level. Say, this prayer out loud into the field and believe that it is enough:

Dear God, I release all of my needs to you. I pray that you make me aware of the people, places, actions, and things that I need to be aware of in order to create the expression of extreme joy and happiness in my life.

And so, the answer is the same : one must be happy already. One must feel free now. Not at some given time in the future. Freedom can only come to freedom, not to something or someone that is still locked up and unfree.

How can one attract love and freedom, if they don’t themselves resonate at the frequency of love and freedom?

One must remember:

I am love.

I am freedom.

These are the thoughts that should be expressed by the body. For it is these thoughts that are most in alignment with the Truth.

Therefore, if I am love – how would that express?

It would be kind, caring, considerate and service. It would yield to all of life. It would heed and listen to only the law of love. Therefore it would not be in conflict with people, places, activities or events.

If I am freedom how would that express?

It would go wherever it wants, it would say whatever it feels, it would allow the world to be free as well for it would not keep anything in bondage.

Therefore, these are the actions that must be taken in life in order to be truly one with the river.

In fact, this surrender into the river is the place where abundance, miracles, dreams and true love reside. There is no shortcut or back way to this. It is only through the eye of the truth, that the real path of God can be undertaken.

True love is not a new project, or a large amount of money, or a promise from one person, or the extension of a longer life. Rather, it is the recognition that what one wants they not only have, but they are it and this realization will change the course of one’s entire life.

The End of The “I” That Is Not Loved

Are you struggling in one particular aspect or story of your life? This is because you believe you will get love from it.

Ultimately, you may have a “mental breakdown”.

Let’s hope you do!

You have an idealized picture in your mind of how the relationship, job, physical health or beauty will give you the love that you don’t believe you have.

You believe that when you finally get to this picture, it will result in the wiping away of the ultimate human wound:

I am not loved.

Because that belief is so powerful, it will take center stage, life will become consumed with that story and it will begin to cause terrible problems. I am not love, or I am not loved, is also a collective karmic burden and strong, especially in the United States. That’s why there’s often the desire to leave the country or change location in order to attempt to resolve this belief.

Yes, beliefs are very powerful. Naturally when the energy of the belief stops going into the thing that it’s projecting into – a family, career or relationship, through a breakup or a loss, it will in fact, temporarily cease until it picks momentum back up again and re-establishes itself on to something else. These are the intricate tricks of the mind. At this point, the scenario is demanding 100% of one’s attention because the pain is extreme.

Number one, a job, career or stable family and relationship unit cannot be established because that requires both clarity and sanity.

Number two, a solid relationship cannot be established because the burden to bear on the mirror is too significant.

Number three, powerlessness and depression become a block.

Next is an act of grace, clarity in the middle of the night, the realization that one must let go of the belief and the energy that accompanies it.

In fact, the mind must stop feeding the belief and the story, it must run out of steam and stop looking for fuel. The mind only ever is, in fact, finding that which it is looking for.

The first step in any significant shift or change is awareness.

The mind uses dreams, like electronics, and other distractions to try and dumb down and hide from its belief. It begins to construct an image of itself that it is lovable it attempts to be more beautiful, or whatever it assigns the most meaning to, and it will then use it. But it is the mind that is constructing this. Therefore, it has no actual solid, lasting and true foundation.

Interestingly, the mind cannot ever love itself because it is the very antithesis of love. It is the thing that created the problem of the belief that “I am not loved” in the first place!

The idea that one is not love stems from duality, the object that loves and the subject that is loved. The real error of belief, then, is the one of duality. Duality is the greatest problem of the mind. The question to be explored is actually:

What is it that is not loved?

Is it characteristics, words, behaviors, the past or the future?

Those are temporal, they come and they go, for instance, right now, where is the rage?

Duality means good and bad, pain and pleasure, both of which come and go and cannot be permanent.

It is the energy that claims the “I”:

I acted, I am not loved, I am responsible for fixing this.

That energy is the actual problem and not the belief that “I am not loved”.

That I is separate, that I is dualistic, that I is the mind. It is causing ALL of the problems.

Thought is the byproduct of an “I” belief, of a belief in the “I”.

Who has a belief?

Where is this I?

Again, this feedback loop begins in the I.

Am I the behavior of the past? Is I what it desires? Is I what it has? Is I the thoughts?

Who is this I?

This question has no answer. “I” has no actual or real identity. Therefore, it never actually dissolves because it was not there in the first place. You can see from this investigation that the initial problem, had a million places to go: the job, the kid, the money, the house, the parents, the relationship, the behavior, the clients, the house, the location, health, health insurance and so forth. It can actually never pin down the source of its problem

The mind is looking for the source of its suffering, trying to pin it down and say “Look! Aha, I got you!” But it fails; it fails because it itself is the problem. Therefore all that can be done is the shift in perception from the “I” to no “I” or the one “I”, the eye that is not two.

If the “I” is not two and it is one, it cannot go anywhere because where will it go?

It’s chasing itself and never realized that it’s the whole damn problem.

It’s very difficult to let go of identifying with all the insanity of the mind because that’s been the primary experience for so long. Not only that, but others seem to relate to that experience. “If I stop being insane. Who will I relate to?” That is another trick of the mind.

In actuality, the mind, never actually related to anyone. It couldn’t because all it ever saw was the lie of two, the lie of separation.

This is a calling to completely end separation because that “I” is a total dead end. It only goes around in circles and has nowhere to go. Ever. It thinks it can lose something, but it never actually had anything but thoughts, its own crazy and insane suffering is all that it ever had. To let go or stop suffering means to stop propagating any and all ideas of the imaginary.

It means opting out of the “I” completely. This is easy to do, once the “I” is clearly seen as the root of all suffering. Ironically, it’s the return to silence which was the first taste of true divine love in the first place and therefore “I am not loved” has no place here.

One of the most important contributions of this investigation is one’s own freedom but also the freedom that is given to others. When you act from no mind, all other mental activity around you will stop because it will have nowhere to land.

Life, O Life!

Life, oh Life!

The blades of grass moving in the wind, the bird song coming from the spiky suauro cactus, the bright, relentless yellow flowers growing out of the cracked desert soil, the taste of strong coffee in the morning, the feeling of love, the sounds of classical guitar swirling through the promenade, the coiled rattlesnake at the foot of a juniper trees; the fear of the unknown, the striking pang of grief, the sound of a drill in the early morning sunrise, the dark night sky swirling with comets and meteoroids, the dust bunnies under the dresser (relentless, no matter how many times I sweep them…), the grandparent who is motionless from dementia, the loved ones who are battling cancer, the tear of a ligament, crushing back pain, the loss of eyesight, the disappearance of a child, the winning of a lottery ticket…

What a world it is.

This silent beautiful world.

It has created me and you out of itself, this silence. It stares in its own eyes, it listens to its own words, everything it sees, hears and does arise from the vast and infinite unknown, appears in the unknown and releases back into the unknown.

Have you ever been heartbroken?
Have you had your world come crashing down?

A lover betrays you.
Your child dies.
You receive a cancer diagnosis.
You lose a 30-year career.

Inevitably, this world will come to you in many forms and it will leave you.

It leaves you recklessly. Without a warning.

That feeling after it leaves you is so alive.

What next, what about the future, what about the pain, what about the plan, what about how things were supposed to be?

The Truth screaming from every movement of life.

What an extraordinary presentation.

A life lived in and of itself is a magnificent achievement.

Forget about a life well-lived.

Just being alive in and of itself is an incredible act of courage and grace.

Ideas come and go. Action comes and goes. A conversation arrives and it passes.

Nothing to be held, nothing to be grasped.

Just a continual departure. In turn, always arriving.

Here. Here. Here.

Alive. Alive. Alive.

Silent. Silent. Silent.

So many masks being worn, so many fears, so many costumes…

Love playing dress-up like it’s Halloween.

You are eternal.

Don’t be afraid to go up in flames!

The flames of the beloved’s embrace

The flames of the wild furnace of life.

Where could you possibly go?


What a precious gift.

Looking for Love

The long, arduous and often dry path towards enlightenment, on the spiritual path, is temporary.

Although it may seem like it is a dead-end, and that what we know to be true seems dead or void, this is the call of love to stay alive. To stay hungry!

I don’t mean to keep endlessly seeking through the infinite world of form.

This is the end of the world of form, and the beginning of a profound exploration into that which can’t be touched or experienced with the 5 senses, although all that is indeed appearing within it – within you!

To stay hungry for the Truth means, to PAY ATTENTION.

Pay attention to the theatrics of the mind and the personal story, because it is dissolving away into love, from love as love.

This is a major shift in consciousness, just the realization that thought is an abstract formation appearing in the illusion of time is a vast leap towards the Truth in a single lifetime.

In fact, I assure you that consciousness is shifting and evolving.

Even though it may seem like things are fixed and constant. They are not. Even your terrible mood and your depression is on it’s way out. On its way towards more of the Truth.

Keep watching what’s happening, because this is a miracle. Your life, life as you, life right here is full of unfathomable love.

Who cares if it doesn’t “feel” like it. Who cares if your thoughts aren’t “positive” or “interesting”. What does that matter? You are not your feelings or your thoughts. Your feelings and your thoughts are appearing out of True, True love.

Do you know what human love feels like?

Divine love is even beyond the most powerful and profound human love!

And it isn’t reliant on worldly success, a lovable partner or the birthing of a child. It is what you are. This means it is unobstructed. It is free.

It is right here. Independent of the apparent movement of time.

With the simple dropping away, energetically, of that which is lost in the world of form, bit by bit, glimmer by glimmer it appears.

You’ve seen glimpses of it. Maybe for a moment, or for a day or even a few weeks or months.

But it never went away. It is everything. It is animating everything as heartbreak, cancer or loss. That’s it too.

It’s also beyond the world of appearances of what comes and goes. It is independent of existence itself.

It just is. The universe is within it. It is not the universe.

True love is here to totally crush you.

But it’s OK.

It’s OK if it crushes your identity, your hopes, your dreams and who you think you are. For the Truth is worth the burning away of a fictional world that appears in the illusion of time.

The Truth is the ultimate love affair.

Love’s only goal, life’s only goal, is to take you to the home that you are.

So arrive, without leaving.

Embrace, without excluding.

Move, without effort.

Just stay for one moment with yourself, one moment is enough to burn away into True love’s furnace of grace.