Author: kate

What We Can Expect in 2017

liesThe winds of change are blowing in. New opportunities are arising. As we gear up for these changes, the guidance is all about being true to yourself as the truth is always the bearer of light and the only way for us to continue attracting experiences that are authentic and in alignment with all of life.

The areas in which we are still living a lie and believing in the illusions, taking them to be truths are the real reason behind the disruptions, delays and the general falling apart of things. 2017 is completely about the dropping away of illusions and taking off the masks that we’re wearing. Lies no longer work in our experience and the new solar opening is all about complete honesty and transparency in every single aspect of ones beingness, in ones existence. In fact, the more true and honest you are with yourself and with those in your life, them more honest you are in your very beingness, the quicker life will shift to support that within you which is true. This is a very simple message and love is the bottom line.

To move into and with this energy, we must continually ask ourselves “How Can I Live My Truth?” In this question, we’re able to honor how life is appearing and, again, if life is full of disruptions there is some sort of untruth, false belief or illusion which is causing this to happen. We can’t want things to be true when they aren’t and we have to be willing to see what is really, truly, at the heart of the matter happening. To see the truth, we must see through appearances and we can only do this through inner feeling and inner knowing. We must be willing to question anything and everything.

In this transparency everything is blatantly expressing that which is not in alignment with what’s true. Things that are not in alignment with what is true, have not been seen yet and are asking you to see through the illusion. Let me write that again: Things that are not in alignment with what is true, have not been seen yet and are asking you to see through the illusion. If it doesn’t feel right – it isn’t, plain and simple. As the truth becomes seen the appearances change. Like a bolt of lightening, that which seemed so true and so powerful, so daunting and intense, suddenly dissipates like specs of dust floating in the wind. This is it, that’s enough – but the truth must be seen.

As we end the year, we’re coming full circle. We’re completing a powerful journey. We’re ending the war we’re having with appearances. We’re realizing that there are billions of different truths expressing themselves through individual experiences and we’re realizing it’s impossible for life to fit into our ideals. In fact, we’re facing that it was never about life falling into our vision, but rather us falling into the vision that life is having. We’ve heard that we need to give up control, but only the most courageous will actually do it. Only those who are really, truly willing to see and face the truth will fall through. Here, we’re no longer interested in making things appear and disappear, rather we’re coming into the peace that life is. In fact, accepting what life wants will help you come full circle.

2017 will be all about enjoying life’s pleasures and luxuries, but not the way we’ve done so in the past, through material satisfaction. For we know deeply now that that was once one of the greatest dreams, the greatest lies. Material satisfaction is no longer treasured as a luxury, rather we’re after intimacy and special moments with human beings. That is now becoming the answer to our prayers. Material satisfaction and the seeking for objects no longer even brings us temporary joy. Rather, a love for life itself is driving the show.

These shifts in focus will begin to draw us more deeply into an artistic creativity and expanding outside of “the box”. We’re becoming more interested in having a variety of experiences and we’re beginning to see the vast opportunities that lie beyond the appearances. Transformation is at hand now that there is no longer seeking. Here we are leaving the old life behind. Old structures completely dissolve with this realization that they are not and never were real.

In fact, all paths lead to one place and come from one source. The energy of life itself is it and life is only about the experience that is being had. This experience can no longer be about going somewhere and having something as there is only the seeing, hearing and feeling of what is happening. In this space, there is a continual letting go, an undeniable death of every moment, of every experience. Nothing is solid, everything is disappearing and only love is left. Only the silent, still, peaceful awakeness. Can we allow ourselves to realize that the seeing through everything is completely empty? That the core is the starting point, the ending point and everything in between?

Nature continues to symbolize our return to our own nature: that which is watching the watcher. Death and life appearing and disappearing is the dance and timing ever only existed for that which was seeking. That within us that always knew the truth is waking up and we realize that there is only ever experience happening, and that this experience is the gateway into the seeing beyond appearances and illusions that have been mistaken for the truth. In fact, as we notice them we also see right into the cause of our suffering.

2017 will be calling us to make our way backwards. From seeing our illusions to seeing ourselves as the greatest illusion of them all. Undoing all the lies is the journey back home. Once we arrive, we’ll be most pleasantly surprised. We encounter our own child like innocence, our own playfulness. In fact, life, like a small child, only ever wanted to play. Seeing this innocence, means loosing our seriousness. Life was never serious, it was only ever the forgetting of our childlike nature that created this illusion. How did this happen?

As a child grows their innocence slowly becomes suppressed by the primary adults in their life and then society itself. As the parental figures raise their children, they raise their children into “adulthood” taking that childlike nature away. We learn to stop being “immature”, “irresponsible” and “bad”. As adults shame the child of it’s child like nature, children begin to see the remnants of their true self as shameful or flawed. Adults very quickly begin expecting their children to grow up and be serious, yet it is this very seriousness that has clouded our imagination and freedom. As adults, we now enter the “real world” of responsibility and a code of acceptable societal behaviors and manufactured identities to match the structures that continue upholding the lies.

But, dear ones, the uncovering of this and many other lies is a continual pathway that we shall walk this year in grace, humility and love, for in every moment things are not what they seem and we may be in the garden of eden without ever knowing it.

This and That

Most people want to hear something that will help them feel in control of their destiny. They want a message that will resonate with their illusions. They’re not really interested in enlightenment. They want a message that will speak directly to how they can clean up their cages.

They want to be more abundant, peaceful, successful. They want to fulfill their life purpose, get the perfect lover. They want to end their suffering.

What is being written about on this blog is THIS, THIS, THIS. To quote one of my favorite films: It’s the endless space between the words.

I’m always tempted to write about the chakras and the kundalini and the astrological alignments, or to discuss a beautiful meditation and light work and healing modalities which rack up the most page views, but I can’t seem to do it. I only find myself being able to write about something that has nothing to do with words or mental understandings of things. As a professional marketer I’ve considered optimizing my site, promoting content, creating an online footprint. I can’t do it. The energy continually brings me into this emptiness and into a great desire to create words about it, which becomes harder and harder to do – frankly, impossible. The intentions I once had with this blog, to help people feel good, to help them fix their lives and know themselves seem completely abstract.

The greatest challenge for me is speaking about non duality in dual language, which is the language humans use to perceive reality.

Coming to this blog, you won’t get anything here. If you’ve gotten something from this blog, you’ve misunderstood what’s being talked about. This is about loss.

When I first began to perceive non duality, it felt like I was on drugs. It was euphoric. It was the bliss everyone spoke about. Then it passed and I had to cope with the actual realization. Without spirituality, which defined close to 10 years of my life, there was this sudden darkness. There was nothing to hold on to and give me hope anymore. In fact, what did it really mean that I didn’t exist?

There is a lot of sitting now, very little movement. I’m still a mess on most days. But it’s beautiful. What I found with the dissipation, is that there is no longer an energy that holds on to things. I’ve compared it before to holding water in cupped hands. Everything is appearing and dissolving almost immediately. Most interestingly, the past is almost non existent. As though there is no longer memory.

When a strong sense of “I” dissipates, there’s only this moment. It’s not even this moment, it’s the aliveness behind this moment.

Recently, after the awkwardness began to clear love became more and more apparent. This seeing of a perfect order behind things seemed to polish off any remnant desires to change, modify or control appearances.

This is the end of bullshit. You can’t pull any wool over your eyes with the hope of a better future. That energy that wants the better future is the greatest lie we believe. I still make decisions based on what I think is best, but this appears as a functioning. There is no “I” here. “I need” “I want”.

In fact, the love behind these words is astounding. It can’t ever be put into words. It’s crushing in it’s beauty. This is completely unknown. To claim to know it, is to claim to have gotten something. This can’t be gotten.

You are HERE. HERE. HERE. This is it.

Infinite Feelings

Everything you’re attracted to is already in you.

Everything you are repulsed by is already in you.

All things elicit feelings.

Those feelings are appearances in you.

Rising and falling.

Impulsiveness, fascination, appreciation, determination, rebellion, delight, intrigue, abomination, diminishment, terror, agony, heartbreak, torment and sorrow are in you.

These feelings were never yours. They never belonged to you. They exist, not because of you. You did not create them. They are just happening. The same goes for thoughts. Both are just a functioning. It is not who you are.

They appear in perfect freedom, they are happening unbound. They are no different from the sunlight appearing, or the hummingbirds drinking flowers. Appearing and disappearing in perfect stillness.

This is total innocence. This is a love beyond love. The depth of life knowing itself like this is complete infinity.

The Fucking Nice Guy

facesThis moment is full of the ultimate breakthrough.

We’ve held on to an image of perfection, love, forgiveness and peace because that is what is socially acceptable. We made that which doesn’t fit that image wrong, bad and unacceptable. Because of this suppression – the shutting out of how this moment is expressing itself like jealousy, alienation, depression we’ve subconsciously become angry and maybe even full of hatred. We’ve distanced ourselves from the very thing that is God – which is this moment, just as it is. By seeking for an expression of it that is tame, socially acceptable, likable, pretty we’ve lost the very essence of life. The ultimate path to THIS, this moment, is total transparency: “I fucking hate you”, “This is so painful”, “I’m angry”. Without letting these things come up we’re living a lie. We’re sitting behind a veil continually punishing ourselves for not being a pristine illusion.

Through our rejection, we’re actually moving farther and farther away from the source of this expression. Ultimately, nobody ever did anything to hurt you. All of life had to happen for that single moment of that person “hurting you” to occur. But you suffer because you’re not free in your pain, in your reactions to life. You’ve caged your anger, hatred and disgust inside a socially acceptable bubble to stay confined in an image of the “nice” and “lovable” person.

This is about complete freedom to be what is being done. This is the liberation and ironically the return to our perfect still source.

The Juice Bar

leonardIt’s a beautiful morning and I’m standing in line at the juice bar. The young lady before me picked up her green drink and right as she’s about to walk away with it, it slips from her fingers and falls to the ground splattering all over the floor. She’s upset, humiliated and completely apologetic. I think she kept uttering “I’m sorry” for the next 5 minutes. The fellow working couldn’t care less. He felt bad, because she felt bad. I’m standing there thinking, “So what?!” When the guy remade her drink, she had her boyfriend hold it and refused to walk out with it.

This is a classic example of how our sense of “self” plays itself out. This sense of self cannot and will not ever accept it’s imperfection, ever trying to find it’s ideal. In it’s incompletion, it distances itself from the truth not willing to accept that it will never be that which it thinks it is, because what it is has nothing to do with thought.

Many times in non-duality people get caught in one of the three layers of what non-duality is referencing:

The First Level of Non-Duality
Nothing ever happened. There is only emptiness, everything belongs to this emptiness. Everything is in a continual and perpetual state of loss, back to it’s source which is complete stillness.

The Second Level of Non-Duality
Everything is love, happening as love, to love and because of love. There is an intimacy in oneness, an intimacy beyond what can be described as intimate. Since everything is ONE life, there could never be a wrongdoer and a right doer.

The Third Level Of Non-Duality
The human experience, the actual playing out of separation. With the knowing that one is divine, one still experiences and accepts fully and completely every aspect of their humanness, every flaw and imperfection.

Many non-dualists and buddhists prefer to use non duality to shut down their actual feelings of separation, not realizing that while they are awake, they are not necessarily liberated and that this liberation cannot ever be gotten to, as it is not attainable for an energy focused on attainment. Often times the spiritual community prefers to focus on the love level. This helps them to escape the flaws and the imperfection of the human experience. They do yoga, pray and meditate to become calmer, happier human beings chasing everlasting idealism, which is not attainable because it doesn’t exist. It is only imagined. Others stay in the human realm of separation and play out a multitude of conditioned functions. One of which may be shame, or guilt or of course fear.

I point to all three layers in this post, as they are not seperate. They are happening simultaneously. In seeking, even in the non dual community, it is easy to get lost here and loose what is being pointed to which is THIS. For persons deeply in the role of the seeker, to provide a teaching or a practice and a philosophy is to feed the seeker. And the seeker will want to seek, no matter what kind of truth shines for them. That which is seeking, will never want to stop the search, as it is the search itself.

Non-duality isn’t saying don’t be a better, kinder more loving person. Non duality has no recipe for anything. Non duality points only to THIS, it is ever and only pointing to THIS. The freedom of what is.

The Paradox

rsz_movieAll suffering comes from wishing for something other than what is. What is, is that which is always being sought, but it’s too simple, too ordinary to be recognized. What is can never be got out of. That is why the energy suffers. What is, is the stillness behind what is writing these words, yet it is simultaneously that which is reading and writing them. Everything is happening and not happening at the same time. The happening is covering up the stillness, yet the stillness is causing the happening. This cannot be understood, this has absolutely nothing to do with a mental understanding of things, this can’t be thought into, because this is not thought, thought is just appearing in it.

Most people are using these words to cover up the stillness and their non-existence. The idea of sitting still, as nothing, with nothing is not pleasurable. They will have to be with their own death. Yet their death is the love. Going beyond the thought of a “you” is what is being sought. In this, there is no pleasure or pain, yet pleasure and pain are appearing. I’m not saying to not look for this and not to seek, this is the same as saying to seek. This is about whatever is happening, whatever is, whatever is appearing regardless of if it’s seeking or not.

Most times this feels like watching a movie. Occasionally, the energy will identify and then collapse back into stillness. But there isn’t an “I” doing these things, facilitating this collapse – it’s just happening, like the sunlight and the wind. In it’s desperate search to eradicate itself, which it can never do because it doesn’t exist, the “I” desperately seeks for it’s home. It’s like a dog chasing it’s tail, it will never make it home, because home is what it is, yet it is unaware of it’s true nature so it looks in the flow of things, in time in order to complete itself. In this search for completion are great measures towards seeking pleasure, which is mistook for happiness.

Happiness is the freedom of life just being as it is. This can be horrific. It can look like murder and rape, or it can be beautiful and look like friendship and success, but this is all ONE thing, ONE energy, ONE life doing this. Nobody is responsible for the appearances, nor is it possible to change, modify or control them. You have to be here. You have to be with what’s happening. But the thoughts will appear and drift in time, from past, to present and future. And the idea of an “I” getting something will arise and storyland will start. Yet, this is it. THIS.

The logical argument for the human is to say, “So, she’s saying there’s nothing I can do. I’m fucked.” No. This is pointing to stillness. This is saying there is no you. Or even better “She’s saying don’t do anything, just be a blob.” No. There is no you doing anything. “Oh, then I must try to be as present as possible, be here now, be here now.” No. There’s only this, whatever is happening is IT.

Light Up Your Chakras

The sense of a seperate self exists in the chakric system. The more aware a body is of it’s physicality the clearer it can sense this separateness.

rsz_buddha

Social Conditioning

Each body’s sense of self is conditioned. This conditioning is most often not in alignment with how the body truly feels. For example: the body, societally, is told it must do certain things, whether that’s school, work or any other behavior or functioning. Through time, the body begins to naturalize that which is conditioned and inauthentic. The conditioning becomes an energetic mismatch to the body’s wisdom, the body’s desires, the body’s innate inner knowing of it’s own inner truth, its own nature.

The resulting sense of discomfort is energetically “trapped” within the chakric system. Each chakra is responsible for the authenticity of the body, for the body’s expression of its’ true nature.

The self is an illusion – it is an energetic sensation, an experience that life is having of itself. It is not seperate from life. It is life itself. As this sense of self claims and begins to identify with life, it develops this sense of an “I”. Through an “I” life is no longer experienced as an innocent beingness, a free and spontaneous aliveness. This “I” is now a seperate self that has to do many things, figure life out and achieve wholeness once again. Ultimately, since this “self” doesn’t really exist and is in fact a total illusion – it will never get there. It will never make it back to the wholeness or love that it already is, was and forever will be.

This conditioning could be seen as a blockage to self-realization. But once the body accepts it’s inner knowingness, it’s true nature, once aliveness wakes up in the body, it is seen that there could never be such a thing as a separateness.

None-the-less, the purpose of this post is to explain how the seperate self functions, in hopes of spotlighting it, not as a blockage, but rather as an appearance arising in the love that is everything.

What About My Body?

The awareness in the body is life. Everything that is being experienced seemingly through a localized consciousness, the awareness, the aliveness, the sense of separateness is utterly and fully complete. The body knows this and so it looks for it’s own completion as long as it is identified as a separateness. Because of this knowing, seeking is inevitable. This can be spiritual seeking or a seeking to fix thoughts, feelings and sensations of separateness.

The body, because of it’s wholeness, senses Truth. Awareness of the body’s sensations is a direct awareness of God or aliveness. This is apparent in meditation, yoga or any mindfulness practice. Once the person is awake, this sensation is all there is. It is not local any longer, it is like an explosion from inside of the body to everywhere. The sense of a seperate self is gone. Through time, conditioning may or may not fall away, but this has nothing to do with what is, was and always will be here – which is awareness, pure love.

The Chakras

A sensation will arise out of nothingness, out of aliveness and arise as an experience in the body. As the sensation becomes the experience it will register in the sense of self.

The sensation will arise within the 7 chakric centers, which are:

chakras2Root Chakra: The root chakra is the energy center responsible for our humanness, for the physical world. This chakra spotlights any issues of physical security, safety, being provided for and feeling comfortable in the physical world. Emotional and physical sensations related to these earthly, physical issues can be experienced in this chakra. Any issues relating to the anus, or excretory organs are an imbalance in this chakra.

Sex Chakra: This is the chakra of ideas, creativity, urges. What is illuminated in the sex chakra is work, any creation cycle, art, urges and any and all desires such as desiring a person, wanting to write a poem, wanting to make a cake etc. Any blockages in this chakra usually correspond to a non-creative experience. If this chakra is not active, creation is also not active. Any issues related to ones sexuality or sexual organs can be found in these chakra blockages.

Navel Chakra: This chakra is associated with decision making, will, trust, self-doubt, fear etc. This chakra is ultimately responsible for taking action and making decisions that support the ideas and creativity of the sex chakra. When balanced, a person has a strong sense of what they want. Physical imbalances can be traced to any issues in the digestive system, intestinal system, kidney’s or liver.

Heart Chakra: The heart chakra is responsible for how connected we feel to life. Imbalances can immediately be detected in relationships and in self talk. Feelings of wanting to hide or withhold love, depression and a generally melancholic or depressive ambiance are a result of “shutting down” the love that is apparent in everything, in all of life. Imbalances in this chakra can be seen with any heart or lung issues.

Throat Chakra: This chakra can be felt by the tone of voice. The more “fake”, strained or imbalanced the tone is the more imbalanced the chakra. Other imbalances can be reflected in a lack of communication and articulacy, being at a “loss for words” or generally saying that which does’t feel true –  whether that’s lying or not speaking ones truth up front. Imbalances can arise as sensations such as having “a frog stuck in the throat” and arise when one is not living in alignment with one’s inner knowing or Truth. Physical imbalances are thyroid problems, throat issues, tooth, gums etc.

Third Eye Chakra: This is a chakra related to ones “buddhahood”. The more active the seperate self is the more closed off the awakeness is. Awakeness refers to awareness. The ability to perceive, sense and feel what is truly, at the heart of the matter, happening. Blockages in this chakra typically result in sinus and vision problems.

Crown Chakra: The crown chakra is responsible for inner-knowing. This is the chakra most often associated with self-realization and the dissolution of identification with the separation of the sense of an “I”. Sensations of the crown chakra are complete stillness and a love that feels like it is everywhere rather than localized in the physical body. Blockages in this chakra are compulsive spiritual seeking, brain disorders, obsessive thinking and negativity.

The degree to which the sense of a seperate self is felt is determined by the blockages in the chakras. One may go ahead and explore these balances and imbalances to discern how identified they actually are. However, the energy that decides to explode and dissolve this separation is not the energy that is seeking to do so. It is the all-knowing, the all-seeing, nothingness or love that reveals in timelessness the Truth. This cannot be found, this can only be experienced.

The Light Up Your Chakras class that I teach on this website is based on Kundalini Yoga. It may or may not have been responsible for my body’s recognition of Truth. While it was a part of one of many awakenings, within it is information that was responsible for my journey. This is neither here nor there. The course is aimed at illuminating what separation looks like, what it does and how it is causing suffering. Whether or not separateness dissolves is something no one knows and no one can do. The Truth either wakes up or it doesn’t, but a consistent energy practice can greatly aid and balance the seperate self.

To take the class click here or to request a Free podcast on the “Root Chakra” click here.

Getting There

taoThe human only knows its sense of self through comparison. It sees itself in relationship to what others are, what others have, what others are doing. It believes it’s superior or inferior, because it looks at other formations as having a better or worse experience than it, itself is having. Everything it does is to get to an imaginary destination in time, a place that is always better than here and now. Here and now is never good enough. Everything it sees and experiences is seen through the perspective of an “I” it is this sense of self that claims these experiences and observations as part of “my story”. This story and resulting sense of self has grown so strong in humans that it’s an energy, a feeling of separateness, an actual experience.

This energy believes that when it gets what it wants it will be whole again, so it designs everything it does around becoming complete. When the human listens to music, rides a bike, does a spiritual practice, engages in work, meets with friends, does drugs and drinks, has sex or does any number of things their sense of self disappears momentarily. The thoughts about figuring life out and where to get to subside. In this, the human catches a glimpse of it’s true identity, of love. It then continues to look for fulfillment and meaning in doing things, getting somewhere, while the whole time that which it was seeking was always its own disappearance. It was never that you felt love while making art, or love or working, it was that you were making art and you disappeared, so all there was left was love.

Everything the human does is to make itself disappear, in order to feel whole again. But this is a dead end. You can never complete yourself when you “get there” or “make it”, because you were already complete and your wholeness was always there, in what was happening. Very few people can say they’re in love with their life just as it is, that they’re not trying to “get somewhere”. Most people are so driven to give their life meaning, secure their soul mate, move up the ladder towards more money, success and power that the present moment, the love in what’s happening, completely eludes them. In their search for happiness, in their search for wholeness, they resist anything that makes them feel seperate. It is in this endless cycle of chasing pleasure and avoiding pain that humanity has set up it’s existence.

There is nothing wrong with this. This is what’s happening. But you are not experiencing this. You don’t exist. Life is experiencing you and this is just another experience life is having. You are just a thought arising out of nothing. This thought is now an energy. But it’s no different than dust. You are a complete illusion. That which animates you is everything, all of life, which is love. And everything that is being witnessed is seen, heard and experienced as all of life. This is where the line of wrongdoing blurs, the desire to acquire and gain or hold onto any form dissolves. That which is awake and aware of its true identity is pure and complete love, and this love is that which everything stems from. All of life is in a grand love affair with itself. There is an intimacy beyond intimacy in this. It can not be seen, or put into words. It’s neti, neti, neti: not this, or this or this. If you can see it, it’s not you! This cannot be seen.zen

You cannot make yourself awaken. Nothing you do will get you there. You can continue to practice spirituality, participate in pleasure and heal physical, mental and emotional ailments with various modalities. And these are good things to do, they will make you feel better. But you won’t awaken. You are already awake. Some humans give the appearance of an “enlightened human”, and thus others want what those humans have. But all we can ever see or feel is the apparent sense of “self” someone has. In some humans this sense of self is stronger than in others, but what determines that expression, that sense, is nothingness. The aliveness and awareness, the love, was, is and always be everything that’s happening. You can try to “be present” and practice mindfulness and loosen your imagined sense of self by becoming “less ego” more peaceful, kind and loving, but this won’t get you there. Nothingness decides what is done, and that which thinks it’s choosing to awaken is just a thought, an appearance that fades and transforms like a raindrop, or a leaf falling. That which is reading these words, is the same thing that is writing them. This is the love. This is the freedom. In not getting there, you arrive.

Setting Goals

VanAs I hiked one of my favorite trails in east county yesterday, I found myself totally in “zen” mode amidst the pine trees, boulders, sweeping desert views, pretty butterflies, cool insects and… (I could go on!) I was the only one on the trail and merged completely with my nice experience.

Then the thoughts about life appeared: “What was my next goal to set?” “How could I fix my life?” “What is it that I REALLY want?” As I watched the thoughts, which by no means were coming from an unhappy nature but out of the desire and curiosity for the mere possibilities in my life, I stopped.

Who would fix my life? Who would make it to the next goal? Who was doing the wanting? Let’s say I figured out my next to-do item, got clear on the actions that would improve my life, then what? Then I would still end up on this beautiful trail immersed in it’s beauty, complete with nothing. Or maybe I would be in the midst of my next corporate meeting looking at my watch, or in a passionate embrace with my lover, or writing marketing copy for endless hours, then what? Who would be doing those things? Or wanting other things?

The you that is experiencing life and believes itself to be the chooser or the dooer is just another experience of the true experiencer. This you that has something to do and somewhere to get to, is not that which is desiring, watching, thinking, listening or feeling. All of life is doing this. Life is that which is have an experience of a you. The you that is immersed in the perspective of trying to figure life out, is a you that is not conscious of it’s true identity. This is why you can never make yourself awaken, you aren’t that which awakens, you are the awakeness itself. Where this energy focuses and how it expresses has nothing to do with you, you are a complete illusion. You never existed, you are not having an experience of life. How could you? Did you create the seeing, the listening, the thinking, the functioning of digestion and neurochemistry, the depth of emotion, the ability to love?

Can you even begin to scratch the surface of the beauty of this message? If you don’t exist, then life is that which is desiring, choosing and doing. This means that you could never set or meet your next goal, fix, modify or change your current experience. To do so is complete insanity. You are not desiring, you are the desire, you cannot choose, you are the choice itself, you could never do anything, you are that which is doing. Can you go into a void like this? Can you loose yourself completely until you dissipate into the vast sea of awakeness? Can the life that you are be still enough to awaken to itself?

The seeker energy cannot comprehend it’s death. It will always claim, attempt to fix and identify with the thoughts it’s having. And I’m not saying not to do this. How could I say this and how could you stop doing it? This is what’s being done. This is life choosing this experience of separateness. But nothing changes in either experience. What’s true will always be true and that which is seeking for the truth can never find it because the truth is what it, itself, is. To look for oneself is to completely loose the point of this message.

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