The underlying discomfort, slight anxiety, something’s not quite right…boredom…

What is it that is lurking beneath the surface?
You stand in line at the cafe, eat your dinner alone, sit in front of the TV, go to work, talk to the neighbor, clean the house…
Still, nothing removes this feeling.
Something is not at rest. Where to go, what else to do? Something must get done right now, somewhere…
There must be someway to move ahead, something more to take care of.

Surely time is running out.
What if I never arrive?
When will I get there?

Thoughts.

Coming and going.

Slight irritation. You feel it, like thunder, it strikes… out comes anger, grief, emptiness.

A number of attempts to control, repress, deny, project outward, displace, or sublimate are put into motion.

Why didn’t you do this for me? The wife yells at the partner.
Why can’t she treat me with more respect? The employee says to the boss.
What else is there that I may want? The anxious seeker waits for more stimulation.

Before you know it….you’re in bed, tired, hungry, shopping online, watching Netflix, making plans to travel, change your job, meet someone new.

Searching for another way to run.
Another way to hide.

Subliminal daily, internal conflict deeply run by thought.

This subtle discomfort, perhaps it’s been there since very early on.

A sense of unease…dis-ease in the body.

We learned that this discomfort means something is deeply wrong.
And that we are flawed.
And we’ll never make it. How could we?
We are not only bad, but also, one day we will be annihilated.
And what was it all for?

I need to know.
I need to know.
I need to know.

This existential unease, usually results in any number of attempts, as described above, in order to resolve it.

What if I told you it cannot be resolved? That it WILL not be resolved.

That even when the dream job comes.
And what is wanted is possessed.
And the body becomes immaculate.
And the money is pouring in.
And power is finally felt…

Despite these things…

YOU
WILL
STILL
HAVE
TO
BE
HERE
WITH
YOUR
PRESENCE

YOU
ARE
HERE.

YOU
ARE.
PRESENT.

YOU
CANNOT
LEAVE.

YOU
WILL
NEVER
EVER
BE
ABLE
TO
LEAVE.

OR RUN.

OR GET
THE
ANSWER.

YOU
ARE
THIS
ETERNAL
PRESENCE.

The truth is that most people are stuck in running away from who they are. In fact, they believe that they are this runner.

There is no time. So you cannot run.
You will never make it anywhere, other than where you already are.
You’ve never left home.
You’ve always been here.
The eternal here.
The eternal presence of Being.
The eternal presence.
Awareness of the bug on the wall.
Awareness of the tea cup.
The color of the sky.
The movement of cars.
The sound of a voice.
The ringing of the phone.
The sunlight pouring on the floor.
The hum of the refrigerator.

It’s too simple.

In fact it’s so simple, we’ve gone to war with it.
Gone to war with ourselves.

And all along…

It was all that was ever wanted.

This presence.
This simple presence.

This essential grace.